______ _________ ______ _____ _____ ____________ _____
| _ \ \ / /__ __| ____|/ ____|_ _|___ / ____| __ \
| |_) \ \_/ / | | | |__ | (___ | | / /| |__ | | | |
| _ < \ / | | | __| \___ \ | | / / | __| | | | |
| |_) | | | | | | |____ ____) |_| |_ / /__| |____| |__| |
|____/ |_| |_| |______|_____/|_____/_____|______|_____/
is my fake social media feed for thoughts/vents that didn't warrant a long-form post.
aka my "i decided to quit posting on social media but i miss the short post format" experiment
IT'S LITERALLY INHUMANE TO MAKE ME WORK WHEN I HAVE A CRUSH! RAAAHHH!!!
they need to make a life guide for retards luke me. chapter one: do NOT talk about calories in front of colleagues who still consider you a good person
yeah no nvm cringefail habits back in full force. havent eaten shit all day cant wait to suffer at work tomorrow 👍 good night well adjusted citizens
use the fact nobody knows you to your advantage. my coworkers don't know im a fat obsessive retard. time to build a new persona
funny thing. when you recover from ED shit youre still like. lowkey wanting to be skinneeyyy. like i would genuinely kill to have 20kg less. if there was a button that said "kill a random person lose a pound" you bet i would slam that shit full force. recovering is just about seeing yourself about to engage in some ed shit and stopping yourself because it's cringe and dumb to starve or vomit. the desire is still gonna be there
small win: local woman didn't finish entire portion of pasta after she made too much
i hate the coopting of mental illness terms but damn if im not hyperfixated then idk what. spent these past few days comfy cozy sick in bed listening to my insanest hyperfixation musician to date. it feels good to be cringe
im in my gooddamn looksmaxxing era. personalitymaxxing gymmaxxing attentionspanmaxxing fr. once the semester starts mid january its gonna be so over for yall. still kinda fucked up over christmas being soon but its ok ill live. im gonna enjoymentmaxx the hell out of this
zoomers looovveeee to say theyre big boy coders when all they did was edit a html template they generated on the sadgrl layout builder. but tbh i get it i was this way until the tender age of 20 calling myself a coder for knowing html/css. but at least i have the excuse of actually doing frontend shit with it at my job so maybe i WAS a real girl coder.....who knows. either way i still have lots of catching up to do in my js and python courses before i gain the confidence to really start calling myself a coder again. wow i typed the word javascript and physically threw up in my mouth
another day of stuffing my face with food. trying not to beat myself up over it lol! came up with this mantra the other day that i repeat to myself. something along the lines of. the food i just had made me way happier than being thin would ever have made me. still needs some workshopping into a catchy phrase. honestly ive had it with ed communities online. fuck your "hunger hurts but starving works". starving is fucking miserable and it doesnt even work. all you get from it is being lightheaded and feeling fleeting anachan superiority before you inevitably pass out. get real
